There's a couple things about being polite in Friends Quest that I haven't worked out yet.
I don't want to push anyone. Usually I can come pretty close to winning the Friends Quest on my own.... Ten lessons a day, but there's half a day on Tuesday, because the Friends Quest starts at noon. Consider the usual goal is sixty lessons at 90 or better. With my normal pace I fall just short.
One week I got with someone doing one lesson a day on the web. When the other person makes no progress in Friends Quest it's kind of discouraging to me. I understand it, everyone has different goals or reasons for using Duolingo, but there ought to be a polite way to say to the other 'you can turn off Friends Quests in the settings'. That situation didn't work out too well. I hit the Quest but I unfriended the person, so as not to get stuck with them again, and who knows where there are now. A few weeks later they unfriended me.
I kind of added a new thing to my routine for this situation.... I do a lesson early Tuesday afternoon.
If they're on a ten lesson a week goal, I'll usually do a few extra lessons if I feel like it. There's usually some days where I'll feel like it. That's ok by me; I don't want to push them, but I do want to make the Quest. So far I haven't noticed anything there. Those Friends who I get Quested with are still Friends.
So that leaves two others kinds... there's the one who does maybe 10-20 lessons a week. No worries there for me: I'll meet my goal, and with them meeting their personal goal, we got the Friends Quest in the bag. I don't want to push them to do more, and so far, it kind of looks like they're sensing that too. Those Friends who I get Quested with are still Friends.
There's the busier kind. We'll easily achieve the Friends Quest. If we're on the same pace, I try to work it out so we achieve it half and half.
Many times they'll see what's up, and do the lesson. Great. But what if I have more work to do, I've waited some time, and they haven't done the lesson ?
Well, I've got to get my work in. If they felt keen enough about the fifty-fifty part of it, they would have stopped at 30 instead of 29. I guess I wrote this to kill time & give them more of a chance to do 30.
There's a few people who will do more lessons than me in the Friend Quest. Not many, but some. I decided I'm not letting anyone down if we achieve the Friends Quest on Thursday or early Friday, and it's ok if they do more than fifty percent of the lessons. Generally, I wouldn't friend that person to begin with, but it's hard not to friend someone who friends you and always sends you thanks for your achievements. I suppose they friend me in the first place because of 600k+ XP & 1400+ streak.
There's the thing about sending timers. I'm not too hung up on the reciprocity of it: If I sent you timers, and you don't send me, I don't care. I don't keep mental tabs on it. So I usually send them, although I don't want to force someone to do something they don't want to do. I also don't want to oblige them to send back... but there is kind of reciprocity instinct built into us Americans.
There's also the thing where I send a timer on the third day. Usually, we're gonna meet that goal on the third day. What happened if I send them a timer, and they hit the Friends Quest, and then get the thirty minutes there. Do they get the thirty plus whatever is left on my timer ? Do they get gypped out of my timer ? And do they feel kind of put off for having to do lessons for first five minutes straight so as not to waste a timer ?
I'm still trying to work out the politeness rules on the timer...
Anyway, that's probably more on Friends Quest than anyone cares to read. But I hope someone has an opinion that can help me get more comfortable with the politeness part of it.